Wanderlust Heart, Indecisive Soul
This life isn't simple. You don't need me to tell you that but it seems like a necessary opener for this post. I'm in indecisive lady like the woman right next to me. Though sure of ourselves, our decisions never lift their weight.
I don't know about you but I spend more than enough time wondering, 'What's next?"
I'm all about living in the moment and absorbing all I already have placed in front of me but being only human, I naturally find myself exploring the non-existing future and thoughts of change. I don't find this to be a negative thing usually, but I must admit, my mind lately has been a clusterfcuk of 'Where to? What next? How?'
I've decided today to pack these thoughts away for six months. This is my goodbye-for-now to thoughts of base relocation and making a home in another beautiful city completely capable of drowning me.
I love San Diego. With the bipolar but always beautiful weather, miles of beaches I still haven't gotten the chance to explore all of in my past 16 months of living here and endless shops, restaurants and hole-in-the-wall coffe shops, you can't possibly deny the cities beauty and worth.
If/when (who knows?) I leave San Diego, it won't be because this city wasn't big or beautiful enough for me. If I leave San Diego, I'm not sure why or when I'll do it. Will it be because I find somewhere that looks more appealing to my appetite? Maybe because I'll finally decide I could use a white winter. Could I force myself to move out of California? My beautiful home for 22 years of life? Moving to San Diego from a Northern Central California town was easy in a sense because I knew I'd still belong to Cali.
I'd love comments from my out-of-staters! How do you like your city/state/country?
I've fallen so deeply for California, a piece of my almost feels wrong for having thoughts of other territories.
My apologies, my dear. If I leave, I'll still love you most.